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WHO estimates $1 trillion in costs from mental health issues, from depression and anxiety disorders each year in the lost productivity for the global economy. The cost of mental health productivity loss is huge. Here a knowledgeable researcher and expert tells us that psychological avoidance makes things worse. If we are trying to squash discomfort hastily we are avoiding. It becomes a crutch says Luanna Marques, author of several books and a physician at Massachusetts General Hospital, a crutch that rather than alleviate anxiety exacerbates it.

Understanding the patterns of avoidance its process is the first step. Science induced ways can help us sort this out. Reacting only makes things worse, it fuels the fire leading to even more problems like operating a pressure cooker without a valve. Replying hastily to an email that upsets us or raise our voices without considering the consequences. Retreating is an act of moving away or pulling back from anxiety inducing situations. This only tends to increase anxiety as the underlying situation is still there. Then there is Remaining which is sticking to the status quo to avoid the discomfort of change, such as clinging to a job or a relationship even when we know it is not good for us. Marques suggests three science based methods to fight all this, and fight psychological avoidance the powerful enemy.

First Shifting by checking in with our thoughts, particularly when anxiety comes knocking. In these moments we often have black and white distorted thoughts when we are telling ourselves something is such and such. Shifting is taking off the dark, monochrome glasses and seeing the world in color again, says Marques. She asks one to challenge your thoughts, clean out your lenses. One says- I have a lot to bring to relationships, I have had successful relationships in the past. One can now sleep better at night and set you on a journey to follow what matters most to us. The opposite of avoiding she says is Approaching, which is not charging at your fears head-on, but taking a step that feels manageable. One asks oneself what is one small step I can take towards my fears and anxiety to overcome avoidance. Even the smallest step can rewire our brain. Aligning is living a values driven life, says Marques. The daily actions now align with what matters most to us- our values in life. In intense anxiety emotions not values dictate our actions. To lead a values driven life we need to first identify with our values, for health, family, work, or anything else. Then we dedicate time and effort to our values. In conclusion it is not about being fearless , but about not letting fear dictate our lives, says Marques in this excellent approach she has given.